forgive me for i have sold out
nothing important May 10th, 2008
What would it take? What is your breaking point? The threshold you cross when your caffeine headache is intolerable. I was out of town for a couple of days. The FrancisFrancis X5 does not travel. She likes to stay home and hold down the counter.
So, I did the deed. I went to Starbucks for a triple spro. They wanted me to call it a Trenti Venuiti or some such nonsense. As you can see I was in disguise. No, I did not purchase a 1/2 pound of the much-touted, the other John’s favourite, Regalo roast. They sell it in small quantity trying to create some false atmosphere of “scarcity.” Like it’s crack or something. I even gave them a false name to write on my cup when interrogated by the chipper register monkey. Did I drink my espresso? Yes. Did I enjoy it and did it make my headache go away? Yes and yes. Am I a sellout…
May 10th, 2008 at 8:13 pm
Worlds collide!
May 11th, 2008 at 2:15 am
Things fall apart, the centre cannot hold. If I had a subscription, I’d cancel it.
May 11th, 2008 at 6:24 am
that stash is soooo creepy. almost as if it crawled out of the road warrior’s australian outback.
don’t hate on starbucks. they provide many a tasty beverage for cyclists world wide.
May 11th, 2008 at 9:21 am
NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOO.
At least Starbuck’s $5 coffee makes a gallon of gas look rather cheap.
You must summon Rasta for some spiritual guidance pronto!
May 11th, 2008 at 1:41 pm
I’ve been feeling the rasta’s smooth canadian vibe all day; I’ll retract my previous statement. But I don’t think its very tasty.
May 11th, 2008 at 5:24 pm
I will save you, brother John. And hopefully save John K from himself. Stumptown to the rescue . . . watch for it in your mail.
May 11th, 2008 at 7:35 pm
FrancisFrancis?
May 11th, 2008 at 10:07 pm
Desperate times call for desperate measures. You recognized your wrong doing and were willing to admit it. Besides how can you really know quality without branching out every once in a while and trying something different?
May 12th, 2008 at 10:47 am
i think john was feeling the pressure over time equation. he obviously needed a fix. so does he go to the mom and pop dealer pushing the fine columbian roast he seeks? how do you find these small coffee dealers when you aren’t in your town? i’m sure after hours of searching for a small, fair trade, organic “coffee house” i think they call them, john g was jones’ing to the point past the shakes. wearing a tie, i’m sure his breathing was constricted by this point. his last resort had to be giving in to the don of the coffee house world, who hold locations on every corner of every block, in every town, everywhere. making semi tasty, trendy expensive drinks that taste burnt yet still somehow are impossible to resist. i’m sure at the point john was, he would have paid a premium for the starbucks IV which for $150 you can have your 3 vente americanos, or the drink of your choice, in a 2Litre IV bag which you can mainline for up to 48 hours. [you have to provide your own IV pole]. thank jah he got out of there spending only 5 dollars. there are so many shiny cups and machines for sale there and bags and bags of semi burnt non fair trade, non organic coffee to choose from.
be proud john g. the don gets everyone. at least he only took you for 5 bucks. and don’t ever ever give them your real name. i know they have a collection of first names which they re-assign to their coffee soldiers. don’t be surprised if you see one of their “barrista’s” named john. john seems to be a popular name with their addicts.
i commend john for using a disguise, spending only $5, and staying loyal to coffee at home. he loves his ‘presso machine so much he even posted a photo.
it’ll be a sad day when the headphones get shaved.
somehow, after tasting the don of the coffee worlds product, knowing that one day this organization will own the world, even i give in every once in a while. they coax me in by playing bob marley. sometimes i get out only spending $5. most times, i lose a twenty.
rolling.
May 12th, 2008 at 11:15 am
Yeah, but $20 canadian?
May 12th, 2008 at 11:25 am
British David- we can no longer use that joke, the US and Canadian dollar are almost equal these days. On the bright side now is the time for me to exchange a Canadian $ prime I won years ago!
JK in NC
May 12th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Don’t feel bad… In fact, in my opinion, Starbucks is one of the least “bad” empire-type companies there are. Did you know that they spend more money for health care for their bariastas per year than on coffee? I find that pretty outstanding… They treat their employees well and have made finding a decent espresso so much easier.
Now, I will say, that their coffee is not the best, nor even really close. However, it’s decent, and it’s reliable. When you’re out in East Buttlick, TX coming home from a bike race (or triathlon) finding something other than gas station coffee is a true treat, even if it is just Starbucks.
May 12th, 2008 at 2:25 pm
We don’t ‘low no damn bike races (or them Triathlons) in East Buttlick, boy.
May 12th, 2008 at 7:28 pm
Hey man..real bikers don’t wear spandex…
May 13th, 2008 at 4:28 am
Long live the coffee shop ride, the one that starts and ends at a real coffee shop. Check out Progress Coffee or Little City when in Austin.
May 13th, 2008 at 6:03 am
Yes, but for the other 100% of the time when I won’t be in Austin, I’ll go where there is a decent cup of reasonable coffee.
It’s funny how people are quick to bag on a successfully executed business model. It’s not their fault people will pay $5 for a sugary beverage or a calorie dense loaded-with-fat pastry. They’ve established the price they want to charge and people have shown they are willing to pay it. Supply and demand, plain and simple.
I do wish Starbucks would teach their employees how to not say ‘expresso.’ That’s pretty annoying.